I was surfing the national news page earlier today and noticed an article about a woman and man who ended up on their local Bridgerton, MD news when police were called by a man on the street.

The couple, Marie and Harold Lipshutz, were going out for a walk after dinner at Vino’s Italian Eatery around 7:00 EST, when, according to passerby, John Seizit, the man took the ladies scarf from her neck and started to, in Mr. Seizit’s words, “violently scrub her face with it!” She then, took something out her purse and proceeded to rub it on the man’s face, and it appeared to be cutting his face to shreds. Seizit, fearful that this man was going to die, did what any interfering, nosy citizen would do; he called the police.

Minutes later, the squad car pulled up next to the couple, and Seizit (too cowardly to approach earlier), sidled up to the action, and heard the man tell the officer, “The Italian, Guiseppe, just can’t keep his eyes off my Marie, but it’s her fault, she just wears too much darn lipstick!” Apparently, Mrs. Lipshutz didn’t take it too kindly and she decided he should wear too much lipstick all over his face.

Seizit had nothing to fear, the man wasn’t going to die from a lipstick death. Just goes to show you, sometimes it’s just better to keep your lips shut.